She looked blissfully beautiful even with those welled up eyes. Tears glazed the most magnetizing part of hers, her eyes. It must be blurring her vision, I am sure. But she’s not making efforts to wipe her eyes to see the blue waves hitting the shore and the sun taking a dip into the other end of the sea. Neither, am I making an effort to see all that. Because that would mean taking my eyes off her. I can’t afford doing that. I just can’t.
Her small nose became smaller when she sniffed to clear the air passage. Smaller, prettier. And then, I guess, it got blocked completely as she is now breathing with her mouth open. Can someone still be feast to someone’s eyes? I don’t know if I am crazy about her or she is a damsel on earth? I am fine with both.
I know I should not relish someone’s grief. More so, when the grief is equally mine too. If she has lost a decade long companion-ship, I have lost a soulmate for 3 decades. An extremely beautiful and impossibly adamant soulmate. I remember staring and relishing every bit of her sitting at a distance, just like it is today. Exactly the same place. I used to have a younger heart then. It knew the art of woo-ing. I don’t know if it still knows. Never tried on anyone other than her.
Today, the heart is beating with the same fervour. It’s no longer as young as it was last time. But it still goes bananas over that small, cute nose and those glistening eyes.
Like mother, like daughter.
I don’t know my affection to that 10 year old little lady sitting at ten hand distance from me is because she resembles the only love of my life or because she is my daughter. I don’t know. But I don’t want to know either. All I want is to grab her just the way I did her mother, to hold her pretty face just the way I did to her mother, to kiss her forehead just the way I did to her mother, and wipe off that ceaseless flow of water from her eyes just the way I did to her mother.
But alas, she seems as adamant to me as her mother.
I kept waiting for the day when she would forgive me for my only sin. I kept waiting for the moment when she would run back into my arms. Destiny’s sense of humour is sick. That day came but it was the last day of my beloved. After 10 years of patience and wait, all my arms could hold was a lifeless body.
I can’t let that damn droplet hamper my vision, now. No. I want to see my daughter to my eyes’ fill, to my heart’s fill.
If only she can run into my arms, like her mother used to.